The Cloak of Self-Doubt

I am having major self-doubt going on right now. I am not pleased or satisfied with anything that I say or do at the moment. Even this blog, I can’t so much as go back and read a single post I’ve written without wanting to delete it. I currently am making myself cringe with every little thing, wishing I had said or done something differently, not being happy with myself, assuming that everything that comes out of my mouth is the wrong thing, assuming that everything I say is actually the opposite of what I should have said.

How do I change this? How do I become more assured in what I do and say. Not doubting and questioning every little thing. Constantly criticizing and critiquing. (Say that fast ten times.)

I don’t have any clue really. When it comes to being more assured in myself, with myself, I draw a total blank.

Maybe it starts with self-acceptance? I’m wondering though, how does one achieve self-acceptance? It’s not just like a sweatshirt that you can throw over your head and be done with it. I’m sure it takes work and patience. But even where to begin? I haven’t got an inkling of a clue.

Any ideas or suggestions as to how to lessen self-doubt  or how one might embark on the journey of accepting oneself would be much appreciated.

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5 Comments

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5 responses to “The Cloak of Self-Doubt

  1. stop and listen to the messages going on in your mind. do they have someone’s voice, was someone really critical of you on a constant basis? If so, that is what you are probably hearing, and you have taken up the torch of that critical person, and become you’re own worse enemy…if you can catch the message, and counter act it with the truth eve if you don’t believe it right now, a new healthy reality will begin to merge!

    • Hmm, that’s a good question. I’m not aware of it being a voice, although it could very well be and I’m just not aware. The way that it feels to me is that it is more deeply ingrained feelings of unworthiness and self-doubt that have always been there (most likely established early on in life), I think. At times it comes up more strongly than other times. On an intellectual level I am aware that these feelings are not accurate, and yet they still seem to overwhelm me all the same.

  2. yes that is how it is how it felt to me for many years, and then i began through therapy to realize that it was mainly my father’s voice that i was hearing, all he did was belittle…and put down ect. went into rages, so i have battled a lot of fear. long story all on my blog…lol
    no i can catch the messages and counter act them

    • Yes, interesting. What I battled with was another beast however. Rather than being told I was unworthy, I was ignored and pushed away when I wasn’t acting “acceptably.” I molded myself to become what I felt they needed, however I never developed a very strong sense of self, nor was I ever able to establish within myself that I was valuable and worthy of love and validation and protection – since, well, they didn’t really protect me from bad things happening to me.

      Thank you for sharing though, I look forward to hearing (ie reading) more about your own experiences on your blog, and this is definitely an issue that I will continue to work on.

      • I had those same experiences. I was made to feel like a burden. I wasn’t protected when i was being raped and abused outside the home, i was just abused further inside my family home…so so sorry for what you have been through…i look forward to reading more of your blog as well!

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