Okay so… sometimes I have nicely- worded and clear blog posts. I’m warning you now – this is not going to be one of them.
*** trigger warning – chaotic/destructive/violent thoughts ***
I feel like every cell of my body is screaming and writhing in agony. I want to rip my skin off. I want to tear off all my clothes and run down the street screaming (I’ve never in my life had this thought or desire wtf). I really wish I was locked up in a mental institution right now in a padded room with a straight jacket on me so I could truly lose it and not be a danger to myself or others.
What the fuck is happening.
I am overly sensitive to any noise, and they are cutting tree branches with chainsaws right outside from where I’m sitting and it feels as though someone is boring into my brain with an electric drill. [Sorry for the graphic-ness – I did warn you.]
It feels like someone is taking my emotional mind and putting it through a shredding machine. I don’t know how much more of this I can stand. What the hell is this and why is it happening.
**** end poss triggers ****
I know I should never apologize for saying anything on my own blog, but I’m going to do it anyway. I’m sorry for my emotional vomiting on all of you. I just needed to express what’s going on for me so that it’s not all pent up inside me.
Thank you for listening. I am really struggling at the moment.